A Courteous Contrararian

Slave Labor

Written By: Jon - Jun• 28•12

I am being forced to write this against my will. And against my better judgment.

This heinous act, this enforced servitude, has been perpetrated upon me by my ‘best friend,’ the administrator of the blog. He published it as a blank blog and has warned me, repeatedly, ever since, that Google (apparently a nefarious multinational corporation of the type we see in the latest summer blockbuster movies) will ‘pick up’ the default content and I will be ‘stuck with it’ forever after. It seems as though even errors of omission become part of our permanent record.

Since he is my bestie, he does not want such a thing to happen to me. He badgers me by e-mail, by text, and by phone. If I do not answer, he leaves a message. It may well be that he believes that together we can thwart the worst intentions of this Google Company and somehow alter the course of history. To accomplish this, he has cast me in the role of the reluctant hero; deeply flawed yet somehow lovable in his way. I do not accept this mantle yet I seem to have no choice.

Not wanting to leave a blank legacy then, I am forced to write something and write it today. I’m a born again believer and a great fan of the Sermon on the Mount. As such, I attempt to live with purpose and deliberation. My twin horrors would be to not follow the Lord and to not make a difference in my tiny sphere of influence.

Since he (his name is Dave) knows this, he has published this blog against my will, knowing I would not leave a blank legacy, and perhaps hoping I can bring this Google to its knees. I will do my best.

He has also given it an insipid name, The Jesusians, and an incomprehensible  tag line. As if there were a large army of people called The Jesusians out there someplace, just waiting to do battle with Googles. This is clearly not true. To my knowledge, I am the only Jesusian in existence.

I used to be a Christian but I became disillusioned with much of the message being advanced within Christianity. Not wishing to identify with some of the unthinking pap being perpetrated upon us, or at least upon me, by our leadership, I renounced my Christianity. At the same time, I try to love Jesus and know he loves me. Not wishing to disappoint him (again) by my break with Christianity, I thought to honor him by becoming a Jesusian. This allows me to identify myself as a follower while distancing myself from some of the more grievous concepts being showcased to the world at large. It is also a good conversation starter.

I tried to change the name from The Jesusians to something better, but all that came to mind was Jesusian. Still, thinking it better than the alternative, I used what Dave called the ‘back door’ to change it, but the change didn’t take. Apparently, Google in not unaware of my schemes. Or perhaps they are in cahoots with a company called Word Press, which may have pressed my word change out of existence.

Since Dave is a wonderfully talented techie, perhaps he might do battle against one or both of these oppressive giants and make the name change for me. Especially now that I have succumbed to his will and made this first post. Perhaps he might also find a way to change the insipid tagline. If he is even reading this. I propose The voice of one crying out, occasionally from the wilderness, but most often from the suburbs.

There, Dave. Are you happy?




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